Thursday, July 31, 2008

Day 2 W/O Daddy

Today is day 2 with B out of town. The kids are getting to me. The weather isn't helping.

I would love to just let them loose in the backyard for a while, but I can't stand the heat. When it is 100 degrees in the shade, it's too hot. And I don't even know what the heat index was today, but there was no way I was gonna sit outside and sweat my ass off while my kids got heat exhaustion. I don't even know if they'd want to be out in the heat, but I'm not giving them the option. If the weather lady on Channel 3 is right, we'll have a heat index of 100+ for the next 6 days. Wow. That sucks. I hate heat and humidity. When it's like this, I don't even like walking to the mailbox, let alone taking the kids anywhere. This, of course, means we're stuck inside for a week. I'm going to have to kick my mommy-brain into high gear to find ways to entertain the children. Wish me luck.

Did I previously mention that Brady is going to a Cubs game this Saturday? I wonder what it would be like to be able to go and do random things without the kids on a regular basis. Humph.

Even though I had the bed all to myself last night, I didn't sleep good. Ella's been coming into our room every night for the last 2 weeks. She'll get in bed with us (last night, with me) for a while, then want to go back to her room. I ask her, during the daytime, why she isn't staying in her bed at night. "I just want to snuggle with you, Momma," she says. As much as I love to snuggle my daughter, I equally love sleep. Let's hope tonight I can get at least 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep. Ha. That's funny.

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Can I handle it?

Brady left today. He has classes in Shaumburg for the rest of this week and all of next. This means I'll be home with the kids by myself for 10 days. We'll see how sane I am after 5. At least I get a break after day 10; the kids will be with my mom for 2 1/2 days while I venture up to Alpine Valley in Wisconsin with my best mate, Troy. We're going to see the Dave Matthews Band on August 9th. I finally get a mini-vacation from my children! Woo-hoo!

Monday, July 28, 2008

Spike Rests

On Saturday, Brady took Spike in to get her stitches taken out. She had been spayed 12 days prior, and I didn't know how much longer I could take her stink. She had already destroyed the cone they put around her neck and luckily showed no interest in licking her stitches out herself. All I wanted to do was bathe her. Actually, I had assigned that chore to B. Poor Spike. I think she knew how awful she smelled. Of course that didn't stop her from wanting to sit on the couch.

So on Saturday afternoon, B brought her home and immediately put her in the bathtub. They were in there a long time. Spike emerged a clean, stink-free puppy, who was just exhausted and only had sleep on her agenda.
I took these picture of her resting in her "box" in the kitchen. I know that I complain a lot about her and sometimes I forget that she's just a puppy, but when she's asleep or calm, she's so adorable.

Snap, Snap, Kiss, Kiss

For a long time, I've been worried that Grayson wasn't developing mentally as fast as he should be. He's not really talking, and up until recently, had no interest in things that Ella did at his age.

At his last wellness visit, the doctor asked me what he did when he played with his cars. "Um. VROOM, VROOM!" I told her. I knew where she was going with the question. She said he was doing fine, and that I shouldn't worry. Of course I still worried. G's lack of words has made life difficult.

I'm starting to see that he's gonna be fine. He is doing those things Ella did, only he's about 4-6 months behind when she did them. He has begun to show a real interest in books - something I've been desperately waiting for. Lately, he's been reading them more than eating them. He brings me books throughout the day for us to read together.

He is identifying things in the picture books more and more everyday, and that makes me so happy! The other day, we were looking at a book of colors and when we turned to the page with the green alligator, I took my hand and made a snap motion while saying "snap, snap." He thought it was so funny and quickly picked up on it. Now every time he sees an alligator or crocodile, he makes the motion and tries to say the word, "snap."

He has been so affectionate toward me lately too. He likes to give kisses and "lovins" sometimes to the point that my face is covered in slobber. I don't care. I'm just happy to have him give me a kiss when I ask him for it. It's not just the fact that it is affection, it is that he hears what I say to him and responds.

He's been identifying facial features. He loves "nose" and "eye" and some days I think he's really saying the words. But, again, I'm just happy that he's identifying what I ask him to.

I knew that with G being an early walker/climber/acrobat that his speech might come later than it did with Ella. But now that he's vocalizing more, and identifying more objects, I'm starting to feel much better about things. Now, if only he'd listen and understand what "no" means. I guess it's just one step at a time.

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Pics of G

I was playing with my new phone this morning, and Grayson was my subject.

Monday, July 21, 2008

I remember the days prior to:
"Mom! Grayson's in my room!"
"Mom! Grayson has my dolphin!"
"Mom! Grayson has my water!"
"Mom! Grayson hit me on the head!"

Those were good days.

Friday, July 18, 2008


I have been waiting for this day to come. I knew that it would be soon, but I thought I'd be better prepared. Ella has come to the stage in her life where every other sentence out of her sweet little mouth is a question. And half of the other sentences are her asking for stuff she sees in magazines or on television.

"What is it Momma?"
"I want that, Momma! I want that!"
"But why, Momma?"
"I NEED that Momma!"
"Why? Why? But why?"

This stage in a child's life is often showcased in tv comedies and movies. Comedians use it in standup acts. I have witnessed it in the department store when a child wants every toy in the aisle. I always said I'd handle it differently than other moms had. But no.

I am able to let most of E's questions and "wants" slide right off me. I give her an explanation or I tell her maybe Santa will bring her that toy for Christmas. Of course being the inquisitive gal she is, these answers are not enough.

I have started to get angry with her now. I'm thinking most of it is because of all the stress I've had these past few weeks with Grayson's teething. I don't want to be the angry mom. I want her to know answers and I want her to know that she doesn't need every toy or book she sees. I try to distract her with somethings else, but then she usually has a million questions about that.

I try to just breathe when it gets too overwhelming, but sometimes it's just so hard not to yell at her. I don't tell her to "shut up." That's a phrase I don't believe a child should hear or use. I do tell her that mommy has a headache and needs some quite time. Or I tell her she needs to be quiet for a while. This usually doesn't work.

I guess I just need to suck it up and become the walking encyclopedia I always knew I was.....Encyclopedia Mommy Sarah, Volumes 1-3, with a new addition coming every year for the next 15 years! Grayson will just have to deal with the used volumes when his time comes. :-)

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

"Mommy! Call the firemen!"

I almost burned my kitchen down today. (Is it burned? or burnt?)

I turned the oven to 400 degrees with intention of cooking some fish for lunch. (That's what I get for trying to eat healthy!) I went into G's room to check my email, and I left the kids in the dining room to eat their lunch. After a few minutes I hear G getting upset because he's finished his ravs and now wants down. I walk into the dining/living room and I see the flames inside my oven. OMG!

I immediately know why my oven was on fire. On Sunday, prior to everyone coming over, I shoved a baking sheet with a few dirty dishes into the oven to get it out of my way. I then threw in a muffin pan and a place mat that were also dirty. I specifically told myself not to forget that they were in there. Really. I said it out loud and everything. And yet, I forgot.

The flames were a good 8 inches high, but contained in the oven. I ran to the garage to get a fire extinguisher while calling B at the same time because I didn't know where one was. I was freaking out (cussing like a sailor) trying to find one and B's phone just kept ringing and ringing, eventually going to voice mail. I ran into the kitchen and moved the kids out to the living room, then put Spike in the laundry room. I ran back into the garage and found an extinguisher that looked as though it was 10 years old. "I hope if I need this, it still works," I said.

Ella is yelling from the living room, "Mommy! Call the firemen! Call the fire woman!" Grayson was still in his high chair, but knew something was wrong and was getting mad.

The flames in the oven were almost gone, so I just stood there waiting. I knew better than to open the oven door. The less oxygen the fire has, the better. So with no visible flames, I opened the oven door a crack. Smoke just poured out. I closed it, opened the windows in the kitchen, then ran to the shed to get the only non-ceiling fan that we own, and put it in the doorway to the garage with the garage door open. I opened the oven door again and let some more smoke out.

Ella was freaking out, so I put her and Grayson in E's room and told her not to open the door. I went back into the kitchen and opened the oven door again, this time leaving it open. Most of the smoke had cleared, but the smell! Oh the smell! Most of the dishes survived; there were a few sippy cups that needed to be thrown out though. The place mat had melted and landed on the heating element at the bottom of the oven causing the flames. I pulled out the bottom rack that had the muffin pan and melted place mat on it, and put in out in the garage. "Brady's never gonna let me live this one down, " I thought.

I decided that the smell was just so strong, that I would get the kids ready and we would leave the house for a while. As we were leaving the house, Ella said to me, "I'm really gonna miss my house, Momma. I'm really gonna miss our dishes." She repeated these thing for the next few hours. I tried to tell her that everything was gonna be ok, and that we'd get new cups at the store.

We went to Wendy's for some lunch and ate in the car under a shady tree in the parking lot of Target before we went in to wander aimlessly for a few hours. I had gotten a hold of B and told him what had happened and told him not to bother saying anything ignorant about my memory. I already felt bad enough about the situation anyway. This was the second time I had started a fire in the kitchen. The first happened when we first moved in. I turned on what I thought was the back burner and it was really the front. I had left a pot holder sitting over the front, and it started smoking with some small flames. I hate electric stoves/ovens!

When we got home, the smell was gone. Thank goodness! Brady came home and he cleaned out the oven for me, and tried to get the rest of the plastic off the oven rack I had left in the garage. The smell was so overwhelming for me, I couldn't do it. He also told me that it was a good thing I didn't use the extinguisher I had found in the garage because it is a Halon/Nitrogen extinguisher. Ella just came to me and said that she hopes no more of our dishes are smoking. She said she didn't like the smoke. Great. Now I've emotionally scarred my child for life.

We are all ok, and the oven will work again. We might have to get a new heating element for it, but it'll work. I think I need a vacation.

* Did I fail to mention that since Spike has been home from her spaying, she has had post-surgery diarrhea? Good times. Good times!

Monday, July 14, 2008

Let's recap

WHEW! These past 5 days have been insane! You know you want a recap. You know you do.

Brady left on Thursday to go back up home. He had to get in some more training on a semi before taking his test on Friday for his CDL license for work. On Friday, he was going to go to the NASCAR race in Joliet with some of the guys from work - they had box seats in some private room. Neither of us are fans, but it was something fun for him to do with the guys outside of work, and he knew he'd be getting tons of free stuff from Motorola. He was also going to go to the race on Saturday, then come home on Sunday. All this meant that I was going to be home with the kids all by myself for 4 days. And since we had a busy weekend planned, I was less than excited to go at it alone.

Thursday night, Grayson still had a fever and didn't sleep longer than 2 hours at a time. He wouldn't eat or really take a bottle. It was a really rough night. His fever finally broke around 4:30 a.m. and I felt relieved. This soon faded.

Friday, although he didn't have a fever anymore, G was still irritable. He still had a low appetite and was just in a pissy mood all day. I was trying to get some cleaning done because we were having guests over on Sunday, but all he wanted was to be held or be near me. I had wanted to get my grocery shopping out of the way, but that didn't happen either.

Friday night he slept for a few hours before I had to bring him into my bed to sleep with me. He never sleeps in our bed because he thinks it's too much fun to try to jump on Daddy. It worked out good that Daddy was gone, and we actually got some real sleep that night. Of course I had to put Spike in her box in the kitchen. Her kennel is next to our bed, and with G waking up every now and then, she kept thinking it was time for her to get out and play. So I thought it'd be best for everyone if she slept in the kitchen.

When we woke up on Saturday to the rain (I love days like that!) I realized that the berry picking meetup was obviously cancelled. Although we'd been looking forward to it, I was sorta glad. I had a house to clean and errands to run, and this just gave me more time.

Grayson was in a good mood, and Ella was still asleep at 8 a.m. when I walked into the kitchen to find Spike sitting in her box next to a pile of shit and piss. What a way to start the day! So, although it was raining outside, I carefully got her out on her chain without getting any crap on me or the floor. B just built her a dog house, so I felt just fine sending her out in a downpour. Plus I was pissed off (no pun intended).

After getting the floor cleaned, the kids fed and packed up, we finally left the house around 11.

We had to take the garbage into town. This is usually B's job, but since he was out of town.....(did I mention that I had to mow the yard on Friday, too?). We don't pay for garbage pickup because B has a dumpster at his office that we use. So every few days, he loads up the bags in the back of his work truck and hauls them off. Well.....he failed to do this before he left, and the stench of this stuff was gagging me all the way to Champaign. And I felt bad for the kids having to ride so much closer to it than I. (I drove as fast as I could over there, and Febreezed the car when we got home).

We then went to Sam's Club. This was the first time I'd taken both kids there without B. It didn't go to badly. If I have to do it again, I will stick to the regular carts. I thought E and G would like the big kid seats on the special carts. E kept buckling herself in, then wanting to be unbuckled. G kept standing up and trying to escape. I was very excited, though, that I got to use our new checks from our new combined checking account! I'd been waiting years for that pleasure!

We then decided to go to Wal-Mart. I just wanted to get in and get out, but that never works. We were able to find what we needed in reasonable time and I was impressed that there were no major meltdowns from the kids...until the checkout.

G wanted out of the cart, and Ella couldn't stand in one spot. I handed the cashier a blank check, knowing that they just print them. She asked me for my license, typed my number in and handed it back. She then gave me back my check and a piece of paper and said, "You check is declined," and just stood there. "I'm sorry?" I said. She repeated herself. I knew that there was no way this was possible, and had I been thinking clearly (i.e. no screaming kids or a long line behind me) I would have told her to try it again because she probably entered my number in wrong. Instead, I whipped out a credit card and told her to put it on it. I was pissed off!

I got the kids in the car and went to the gas station. I was on empty and had only $5 on me. I was gonna write the check for $20 over the amount so I'd have gas money.....we see how well that worked. So $5 got me a gallon of gas - just enough to get me home. Seriously? Who buys $5 in gas these days?

After I got on the interstate, I called the 800 number the cashier gave me. The woman on the phone got all my information and told me that there was no negative activity against the checking account. No shit! She asked me if I was still at the store, and I told her no, that I had to leave and was forced to charge my purchase. She said that if this happens again, to stay at the store and get the cashier on the phone so they could get an approval number. DUH! I knew that. I was a cashier for many years. Why the fuck hadn't I done that? I was now cursing myself out! Then I shifted blame to the cashier for probably knowing she could've done this, but instead just standing there like a moron waiting for another form of payment. I actually screamed in my car as loudly as I could. The kids looked confused, but then went back to watching Nemo.

So Saturday afternoon, I was able to get most of my cleaning done, which made me happy. Sunday was our big day. We had about 20 people coming over and I really wanted things to go smoothly. As mentioned in a previous post, my gatherings never really work out, so I was impressed that more than 3 people attending my "Water Works" party.

Around noon, I called B and asked him when he was going to be home (on Saturday he told me he'd be home before everyone came over at 3:30). He said he was getting ready to go golfing. I was speechless. I started to cry. Not only was I running on fumes, but I had just gotten horrible cramps a few hours earlier, and I still had a lot to do before everyone arrived. He asked me if I needed him and I told him yes. He said he'd come home if I wanted him to. Of course I told him not to. I didn't want him being pissed off that I made him come home and then him just be a jerk the rest of the afternoon. I told him just to get done ASAP and hurry home.

I didn't have all the food prepared by the time the first guest rang the doorbell, but it was ok. Everything else was good-to-go, and the moms and dads didn't mind watching my kids while I finished up. I think the total head-count was 23, including me and E and G. We all had a lot of fun and I was glad I got to spend time with people who don't live in my house. For the first time ever, I had more people in my backyard that R and J did in theirs! I felt so cool! The kids played in the pools, sandbox, and on the swing set. Ella was so sad to see them go, that she actually cried for about 30 minutes. "I don't want you to leave!" she kept saying. "Momma, why do my friends have to go?" I tried to reassure her that we'd see them all real soon.

B finally showed up around 6:30. I was a little angry with him, but I realized that I had pulled the meetup off without him, and that made me feel good. Tired, but good. (Plus he had won a new phone for me, so that helped - a MOTORIZR Z6tv!)

Today, B took Spike to All Creatures Animal Hospital so she could be spayed and microchipped. It was really nice to not have to deal with the puppy all day. When it was time for me and the kids to leave the house (we were gonna run a few errands before our meetup) the car wouldn't start. I had failed to put gas in it Saturday afternoon when I got back to St. Joe, and since it was in our driveway on an incline, the car thought it was bone-dry.

I called B to see if we had any regular gas in a can anywhere and he said to check the shed. There was less than a gallon, but I put it in the tank. I then put the car in reverse and let it roll to the end of the driveway. Ella was freaking out in the backseat because she was hot and she didn't understand why we weren't leaving. I waited a minute for the gas to register, then tried to start the car. It started! W00t! I drove the 1/2 mile to the gas station and filled up the car - $76 worth of gas!! WTF! What is the world coming to? But that's a rant for another day.

We now didn't have time to run errands if we were to be on time to the fire station for our meetup. I'd kept it a surprise from Ella, and after 5 minutes of guessing, she got it! We went to the Urbana Firestation and had a tour. There were so many families from C.A.R.E. there that I'd never seen before! The kids got to sit in the firetruck and have their picture taken. Grayson didn't want to get out, and on the way to pick up Spike, Ella told me she wanted to be a "Fire Woman" when she grew up.

We met B at the vet's office to get Spike. She has pink stitches and has a cone on her head. I've never had a pet that has had to wear a cone before. I want to laugh every time I look at her, but I contain it! We brought her home then went to dinner, Sam's Club (not my idea), and PetSmart (also not my idea). Apparently after a major surgery, everyone needs some new chew toys.

The kids and B are asleep, and I now have to go dope up my dog and put her in her kennel for the night. I think I've been sitting here typing for an hour. Carpal Tunnel is going to set in soon.

Wow. This post is really long. Good for you if you stuck through it all the way to the end! You get a gold star for the day. And maybe a few more for the rest of the week, since that's how long it has probably taken you to read it!

Thursday, July 10, 2008

The Little Man is Miserable

Yesterday, Grayson woke up from his afternoon nap with a fever. He's getting in the last of his first set of molars, so I'm assuming that's the reason. I checked his temp prior to bed and it was 100.3. I put the last of the Motrin in his bottle of milk and rocked him to sleep. I just knew that the night wasn't going to go well.

He woke up briefly around 12:30 a.m. but fell back asleep on his own. I decided to just sleep on the couch so that I wouldn't wake up B or Spike when G finally did wake up. About 2 a.m. he was screaming in his crib. I got him out and his body was so hot! I stripped his jammies off of him and put him in a tank-top. Our couch is leather, and I knew he'd be sweating, so I didn't want him to stick to it. I got him some milk with the last of the Tylenol spiked into it (I guess I need to inventory my meds more often) and we assumed our normal position on the couch. It was hard to lie next to him because his body was so hot, but we managed to get some sleep.

When he woke up I checked his temp and it was now 101.3. He was crying with no end in sight, and his body was still so damn hot. I called the doctor's office and they said they couldn't get me in until 1 p.m. so I told them I'd see the on-call doc as soon as possible. I know that the doctors think checking on kids with low-grade fevers are a waste of time, but G just got done with a round of antibiotics for an ear-infection and I wanted to make sure that it wasn't back.

I had about an hour before we left for the doctor's office, so I started the car, turned the A/C up full blast, and loaded up the kids to go to the grocery store for more Motrin (Ella in her pajamas, and G in nothing but a diaper). I left them in the car while I ran in. I know that some people would never,ever do such a thing, but I live in a small town, and I knew they'd be fine. So if you're thinking of giving me grief over it, don't bother.

When I got back, I gave G his meds & tried to give him a luke-warm bath. Normally he's knocking down our bedroom door as soon as I mention bath time. This morning, however, he just cried more after I put him in the water. The poor kid was so miserable. He wouldn't eat or drink anything, and he just kept crying.

He did good on the car ride to the doctor's office, but that could have just been because I had Nemo on the dvd player. We got into the exam room really fast, and the nurse took his weight and temperature - 24 lbs. 15 oz, and a temp of 99.3. Of course it went down - just enough to make me look like an over-reactive mom. The doctor came in and although he was nice enough, I didn't fell 100% comfortable around him, nor did the kids. He said G's ears were fine, and that he's probably just having side-effects of his teething. Then he offered a sticker to Ella, practically shoving the box of them into her hands, and he bolted out the door. I know a screaming kid is no fun, but geez!

At least I know his ear infection is gone, so I guess the $15 co-pay was worth it?

He is still miserable. He napped this afternoon for less than an hour, and he normally takes a 3-hour one. He didn't eat any lunch or dinner, and I've been lucky to get him to drink his milk. I've numbed his gums a few times and I had B get some Tylenol for him. Since they are two different meds, his normal pediatrician said I can give him both a few hours apart. He's so hot, still, and that really bothers me. His whole body is just burning up.......but his "official" temperature is nothing to run to the ER over.

Ella just passed out, and I feel so bad because she wanted to play with me and I had to spend almost all of my day taking care of Grayson. I was able to involve her in a few things, like getting Grayson's bottle or medicine, and she helped me put toppings on the pizza we made, so at least we had some interaction today. But I still feel like I neglected her.

It's almost 9 p.m. and G still won't go to sleep. He keeps fussing over the smallest things, and even his Baby Einstein isn't keeping his attention. It looks like it's going to be one of those nights again. Brady is out of town for the rest of the weekend, so it's just me dealing with everything, again.

Monday, July 7, 2008

Nap Time for Mommy

I have always thought that a person can tell just how tired they were by the amount of drool they wake up in.

Yesterday, Sunday, I was able to take nap. I haven't had an uninterrupted nap in a really long time. So after G went down around 1:30, I headed straight to the bedroom planning to really feel the benefits of our new mattress by taking advantage of an empty bed. I briefly mumbled something of this sort to B as I shuffled into the bedroom. I was so stinking tired! The weekend was long and full of fun and excitement, and I hadn't had much sleep the night before.

I remember waking up 3 times, but not because E had come in to ask me a question, or because she needed to go on the potty. I woke up because I had drooled so much, I had to flip my pillow over - 3 times! Each time I was back in dreamland faster than a pack of dogs on a 3-legged cat.
When I finally woke up with the intentions of actually getting out of bed, I just layed there thinking, "Wow. I was really tired. How much drool can one person actually produce?"

I walked into the living room and looked at B. He said I'd been asleep for 2 1/2 hours. When I told him about my wet pillow, he just gave me the "look," and went back to watching his golf tournament. The "look," (which I'll refer to often, because I get it often) consists of him sorta pursing his lips and furrowing his brow while rolling his eyes. It annoys the shit outta me.

So the nap was well deserved, and the bed passed the test. I was worried that because of the nap I wouldn't be able to fall asleep last night. Ha! Sometimes I surprise myself, because I was actually asleep before midnight, which is rare! AND.....I slept in 'til 8 o'clock this morning! The sleep gods are being nice for a change, and I'm taking full advantage of it!

Thursday, July 3, 2008


We are staying in town for the holiday weekend. B's on call (when isn't he?) and although I could have taken the kids up north by myself, it didn't seem fair to leave him home alone.

I invited a few different people/families over for a cookout and fireworks on Saturday, but I don't think too many are coming. I know my parents, my SIL and my niece and nephew are coming, but I think that will be it. I suppose it will be easier this way. Since it's only family coming over, the house doesn't have to be as clean, and I don't have to worry about making things run so smoothly. But at the same time, I'm still frustrated that the other people aren't coming, or haven't told me if they are or not.

I like to entertain. I love putting together fun foods, and making things as enjoyable for my guests as possible. The problem is that I haven't done it very much because we never really have people over to the house. I invite people all the time, but no one comes. It's been this way my whole life.

In junior high, and high school, people didn't come to my birthday parties because my birthday was always during basketball playoffs, and there always seemed to be a game. In college, it was finals. (My birthday is December 13). You would think that I'd be used to this - trying to plan something and people not showing up. Even with the moms group, it seems to be the same way. I'm trying to plan a mini-carnival for the kids. I had lots of people say they were interested in it and that it was a good the beginning. Now that I'm trying to put it into motion, only a handful of people have actually committed themselves to helping.

I understand that people have schedules and appointments and emergencies. What I don't understand is what makes my birthdays/cookouts/play dates/meetups less important than someone else's? What I don't understand, is why, after almost 4 years, have none of our friends from back home come down to visit? (Seriously. Not a single friend). We live less than 2 hours away, and they can't come down for a cookout, but can drive to Chicago every month or so for a baseball game, boat show, or shopping trip? (It's the same distance).

A lot of B's friends don't have kids, and still spend their weekends getting drunk and acting stupid. They may be in their 30's, but they still act like college kids. I sorta understand about them not wanting to spend a day with the kids....worrying about cussing in front of them, not being able to talk about sex or making rude gestures. But really. If they were his friends, they'd do it for him. At least you'd think they would.

That's part of my problem. I expect too much from people. I think of what I would do; how much effort I put into relationships. I think that if I would bend over backward for a friend, they should do the same for me. If I'm putting in 110%, they should too. Most of the time, I am disappointed because of my expectations. I keep hoping that the next time will be different, and it usually isn't.

So the fact that I gave people over a two week notice about the cookout, and they couldn't add me to their schedules disappoints me. I will enjoy having my family down for the day. I will put on my hostess hat and make sure we all have a good time. We'll cook some steaks, the kids will play in the pool, and we'll light off illegal fireworks ('cause our town doesn't really care). But I'll still be irritated with those "other" people......for a few weeks. Then I'll try to plan something else, get my hopes up that they'll come, and be disappointed again. It's a cycle I wish I could break.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

My Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon

For some reason today, I thought about Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon. I don't know why this game crossed my mind, but I did realize that I essentially know Kevin in less than 6.

1. My husband went to school with
2. Jeff Vezain who plays in the Lt. Dan Band with
3. Gary Sinise who was in Appollo 13
4. with Kevin Bacon.

This information is neither important nor relative to much of anything, but I thought it was sorta cool.